What follows is a repost of “Mom of the Week” over at Mumfection.com. I’m honoured to be a mom, never mind a ‘mom of the week’. Thanks to Eschelle Westwood for including me in this series.
Lee-Anne Ekland is an amazing mother and awesome blogger at Mom Paradigm. She was voted one of Vancouvermom.ca’s top mom bloggers of 2013, clearly she oozes tons of awesome. Her beautiful outlook on motherhood makes her blog a complete joy to read so PLEASE go out and check her out!
1. Give us a play by play of a regular day at your house…
Wake up too early, grab my phone, check email messages. Stumble into kitchen where partner has tea waiting, lovely man he is, wake up some more, get jumped on by son. Have breakfast, chase son. Make coffee. Get partner off to work, son and I play or paint or go for a walk. Meet friends, eat lunch then nap time. Usually for both of us unless I am planning events or marketing my business at Modern Mama Vancouver. Blog a bit, second cup of coffee, watch baseball on TV maybe. (I no longer run Modern Mama Vancouver as of September 2014).
Hmmm…are you getting the drift? Looks like I need to insert more fun stuff. We used to go to swimming lessons, music class etc but we were a bit over-scheduled.
My son goes to daycare 2 days a week, so I get me-time and to focus on building my business. We host international students so we are home for dinner most days. I cook healthy meals as much as possible and keep it simple.
2. How has being a mother changed your view of life?
I realize how important it is to cherish simple things and moments with my family. Time flies so fast when you have kids. Combine that with being an older parent and sleep deprived and you’ve got a recipe for it passing at warp speed.
3. What has been, in your eyes, the biggest reward of motherhood?
Being able to take the time to carve out a new life for myself and to watch my son develop into the amazing person he is. He teaches me to live in the moment, which was something that I struggled with in my past life.
4. What has been, in your eyes, the hardest struggle of motherhood?
I had my son when I was 43. Enough said? Seriously, the sleep deprivation is the most difficult thing to manage, it affects every decision, every waking moment, and its tough to feel positive all the time when I just want to sleep.
5. In what ways are your children exactly like you?
My son jumps before thinking about the danger, he’s silly and carefree in many ways. He’s emotional and moody, and intelligent and naïve.
6. In no more than a couple of sentences give us a description of how you felt throughout your pregnancy/ies…
I felt scared out of my mind, free as a bird and for the first time, I felt beautiful just as I was.
7. How to do you measure a parent’s success in this world? Do you think you measure up to your own expectations?
I think all parents want more for their child than they had. They want them to make smart decisions, be confident in their abilities, love and cherish themselves and to treat themselves with the respect. In turn, to treat people the same and to be a good person no matter what.
I don’t measure up to my own expectations of my son, yet. But he’s working on it.
8. What are some of the lessons you have learned from your own parents about parenting?
I never realized how hard it was for my mom. She was a single parent with no support at all from our father. Having my own child makes me realize how little I understood her struggles. She raised three girls on her own, I have one child and a wonderful partner who does way more than his share. I am fortunate to have that.
9. What do you love about who you are as a woman and as a mother?
I love that through having a child I am letting go of self-esteem and body issues that plagued me in the past. I still struggle with self-love and in fact write about that on my blog, Mom Paradigm.
Having a child really brings into focus the absolute need for me to figure it all out and in the process accept myself just as I am. It would devastate me if my son had to deal with the crap I did. With me as his mom, my son will be challenged in a kind way to own his feelings, to explore his dreams and to be kind to himself and others always. I always do my best and want him to know that it is enough for him to do the same.
10. How do you battle “parent guilt” on a daily basis? What advice would you give to others?
Parent guilt? You mean, if I take time for myself I am somehow depriving my family? I don’t have that so much. When I do, I remind myself that I lived a long time without anyone to depend on me for anything, and can’t undo that. Taking time for myself is necessary in order to give back to them.